[ which is why it's STUPID she feels like this. shenhe is allowed to have feelings. even if she's cursed. or maybe she just really likes wolfwood like that. either way, nahri can't really justify her feelings. ]
A little. He doesn't like to listen. [ this is a lie ] I know there's something deep down that he's protecting, so he puts up a wall. It's difficult. He's difficult.
[ given her previous line of work, she's gotten pretty good at reading people. i, kelsey, am a simpleton, but nahri is actually skilled at this. ]
You can't save everyone. [ this comes from her, barely audible. ugh. this is not the day to be saying this. not after yesterday. but it's one of those things that haunts her. ]
You can't help someone that doesn't want it.
[ because then we get into the matsui situation again, or with shenhe, being cursed and uncursed respectively, under the guise of "helping" - and how that did more harm than good. ]
she breathes in... and breathes out. and then very carefully squeezes nahri's hand. she's glad emotionshare isn't a thing anymore, because she's still... matsui, rang - it's still fresh.]
Maybe not. But you're kind enough to try anyway, I think. [...] I'd like to find you a flower.
[help shenhe looks pleased!! it's just a little twitch of the lips, but she's happy.
she will lead nahri along - they're still just walking. but eventually she'll find a flower, something small and pretty and red, and she lets go of nahri's hand so she can go pick it up.]
[ she'll let shenhe go retrieve the flower. she didn't get a very good look at it, but she has a very limited knowledge of flowers anyway, so it's not like she could offer any insightful commentary on it. she briefly dips back into feeling insecure for being lacking in so many areas, but she shakes it before it can really get a hold of her thoughts. she looks for potential grave offerings instead. ]
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Did something happen?
[ DID YOU TWO FIGHT AGAIN?????????? ]
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No. Or, I don't know if it did. He does not like it when I talk about having to control myself, but... [a pause.] I'm very fond of him.
[she. blushes?? ok.]
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OH ]
Oh... I see.
[ so glad it's insecurity week so this can fuck her up extra for no reason. cool cool cool. ]
But you have to control yourself or you'll get hurt.
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Yes. [she frowns.] ... You understand this more than he does.
[a pause.]
It is... frustrating, to not understand what I'm doing wrong. There are so many rules that I don't know. [guess what her insecurities are.]
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[ THIS IS SO AWFUL FOR BOTH OF THEM ]
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... You have kept up with me. [she says, after a moment. she'll move over to nahri, holding out a hand.]
And you have always been good enough for me.
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Let's go on that walk.
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Alright. [she seems unsure. this week sucks.] Would you still like to look for flowers?
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[ there's still a "we" at least. but now she has to contemplate killing wolfwood because she's jealous. ]
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they can walk, though, and shenhe is quiet, as usual. until:] ... You would tell me if I had done something wrong, yes?
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[ which is why it's STUPID she feels like this. shenhe is allowed to have feelings. even if she's cursed. or maybe she just really likes wolfwood like that. either way, nahri can't really justify her feelings. ]
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... Alright. [she links their fingers, though, as they walk. they can go to the memorials!]
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except she also does do this to herself by making bad decisions, after walking together in silence for a few minutes: ]
I can see why you like Wolfwood. You two have similar temperaments.
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Do we? [she tilts her head a little.] ... He has been trying to convince me to live a little more fully, lately. It's kind of him.
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He could stand to take his own advice.
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I think so, too. [...] Have you argued with him about it?
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A little. He doesn't like to listen. [ this is a lie ] I know there's something deep down that he's protecting, so he puts up a wall. It's difficult. He's difficult.
[ given her previous line of work, she's gotten pretty good at reading people. i, kelsey, am a simpleton, but nahri is actually skilled at this. ]
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Yes. [she agrees.] I don't know how to help him, even if I'd like to. He keeps the doors shut very tightly.
[a little sigh.] ... If I were better at speaking with people, maybe I could.
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You can't save everyone. [ this comes from her, barely audible. ugh. this is not the day to be saying this. not after yesterday. but it's one of those things that haunts her. ]
You can't help someone that doesn't want it.
[ because then we get into the matsui situation again, or with shenhe, being cursed and uncursed respectively, under the guise of "helping" - and how that did more harm than good. ]
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she breathes in... and breathes out. and then very carefully squeezes nahri's hand. she's glad emotionshare isn't a thing anymore, because she's still... matsui, rang - it's still fresh.]
Maybe not. But you're kind enough to try anyway, I think. [...] I'd like to find you a flower.
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[ this seems to pull her out of whatever pity party is happening in her head. she looks at shenhe, then at the ground. ]
Well, we need to make sure there's enough for the others, first.
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[she says, tilting her head.]
It is important to respect the dead, but... you're not just a memory. You can enjoy it now. So I think you should get priority.
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[ well she can't be a little punk about that. ]
...Okay, but just one.
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she will lead nahri along - they're still just walking. but eventually she'll find a flower, something small and pretty and red, and she lets go of nahri's hand so she can go pick it up.]
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