[rang's emotions are tightly controlled, a little like he stuffed it all somewhere -- a deep dark hole where he refuses to let it all out, but there's a tense hum accompanying him that he can't quite get rid of, even as he approaches shenhe,]
I'm surprised that it's him.
[the words are vague, but the hum grows a little louder, incessant]
[she's - actually anxious. it's crazy, she hasn't been anxious in... years. she's quiet for a moment, assessing that hum, the way he's controlled, and exhales slow. it hurts. she hurts.]
I wouldn't have ever thought that it would be. [...] But I could see why. If this wasn't chance - someone is trying to get rid of your team.
[because - you kill buzen, matsui will follow, and rang will have no choice.]
[at that, his emotions break. for a moment, but it does. a white hot rage that lashes out of him, before he pulls it back with sheer force of will and a laugh --]
You're right. I can't believe I didn't think of that.
[he'd just been on the fact that it had to be buzen in the first place,]
It's a clever move. If they'd killed me instead, then Buzen and Matsui wouldn't have been in danger. If they killed Matsui, then Buzen would have held on for him.
[it makes her angry, too, and a little flicker of flame curls around her hands, briefly.]
It is clever, if that's the idea. I can't think of another reason why Buzen would be targeted. He... [there's a little shiver of something sad.] He was well-liked.
to the point where even rang found himself softening towards him, and that's the entire problem, isn't it. that he opened his heart yet again. first rin, and now buzen. he opens his mouth to say something, a nod, or something else about how clever whoever this is,
[the fear makes something in her rankle. something quiet, and protective. she takes a step closer, like she can do something about it. even though she knows she can't.]
how strange, that it's taken death to meet someone who will voice this sentiment to him, when no one else in his life has ever had, he flashes her a smile -- the cheeky grin that he thinks will inspire a punch to the arm, anything that can give them a sense of normalcy one last time]
I'll take it if there is. Just to spite them.
[spite is a great motivator, for living. it's all rang's ever known]
[he gives her that cheeky grin, and she gives him her usual flat look, and while she doesn't punch him - she does lean over to flick him again, as hard as she can.
even with it being as hard as she can, it still feels halfhearted.]
I think that's all that I can ask for. [she says after a moment, watching him.] Congratulations on being one of the most irritating people I've ever known.
[she says, but there's fondness there. something sad and angry about the injustice of the situation they're in all in one.]
rang thinks it's so strange, and maybe his emotions reflect it too. that the first time he met shenhe, she had disliked him so, and with good reason. and then had understood him in the same breath. and that she is standing here now, still understanding. not telling him an impossible hope, or saying he should get to live.]
Good. I'll be annoyed if someone replaces me.
[HE HOPES THAT HE REMAINS THE MOST ANNOYING!!!!!! because he has nothing left to remember him, and at least he can carve an impression on shenhe in this way (sane)]
...I'll be relying on you tomorrow, Shenhe. Even though I haven't exactly been a big help myself -- I still won't have the patience for anyone who refuses to cooperate.
[there's a pause, and then she just. she just reaches, because it could be her last chance to. she thinks about what kaveh said to her about thinking he had more time as she puts her hand on his arm and holds it, watching him.]
I doubt that anybody will. [she tells him, as far as being replaced.
there's a pang, somewhere - that she promised she'd remember buzen. as long as he was remembered, he'd have really existed. she takes a deep breath.]
I will do what is necessary. [she says, with a little nod.] If you need me, I will help.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[a pause.]
If I can help, tell me.
You or Matsui.
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where are you
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I'm surprised that it's him.
[the words are vague, but the hum grows a little louder, incessant]
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I wouldn't have ever thought that it would be. [...] But I could see why. If this wasn't chance - someone is trying to get rid of your team.
[because - you kill buzen, matsui will follow, and rang will have no choice.]
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You're right. I can't believe I didn't think of that.
[he'd just been on the fact that it had to be buzen in the first place,]
It's a clever move. If they'd killed me instead, then Buzen and Matsui wouldn't have been in danger. If they killed Matsui, then Buzen would have held on for him.
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It is clever, if that's the idea. I can't think of another reason why Buzen would be targeted. He... [there's a little shiver of something sad.] He was well-liked.
[like rin.]
... I don't want to see this happen.
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to the point where even rang found himself softening towards him, and that's the entire problem, isn't it. that he opened his heart yet again. first rin, and now buzen. he opens his mouth to say something, a nod, or something else about how clever whoever this is,
instead -- something like fear coils from him,]
I don't know if we'll find them tomorrow.
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Do you want to find whoever it is?
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[that answer is easy enough, and it slips out with a hard edge of anger, then]
I'll leave their fate in Matsui's hands -- and the rest of yours. But I want to know who, and how desperate their reason for living is.
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[she just thinks about... like, how ready matsui is to die at any point.]
... I'd like to know the reasoning as well. I don't feel strongly about making it back, so it's hard for me to imagine.
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I can't find it in myself to stop him, honestly. I've already had to fight him for an entire night.
[but also, he's quiet at the second part, then]
I don't feel that strongly about it myself. Living. Though, I think you know that already.
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I think I do. [she agrees, after a moment.] But I'd like you to have the chance, regardless.
[he might not feel strongly about living, but she does, for him.]
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how strange, that it's taken death to meet someone who will voice this sentiment to him, when no one else in his life has ever had, he flashes her a smile -- the cheeky grin that he thinks will inspire a punch to the arm, anything that can give them a sense of normalcy one last time]
I'll take it if there is. Just to spite them.
[spite is a great motivator, for living. it's all rang's ever known]
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even with it being as hard as she can, it still feels halfhearted.]
I think that's all that I can ask for. [she says after a moment, watching him.] Congratulations on being one of the most irritating people I've ever known.
[she says, but there's fondness there. something sad and angry about the injustice of the situation they're in all in one.]
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rang thinks it's so strange, and maybe his emotions reflect it too. that the first time he met shenhe, she had disliked him so, and with good reason. and then had understood him in the same breath. and that she is standing here now, still understanding. not telling him an impossible hope, or saying he should get to live.]
Good. I'll be annoyed if someone replaces me.
[HE HOPES THAT HE REMAINS THE MOST ANNOYING!!!!!! because he has nothing left to remember him, and at least he can carve an impression on shenhe in this way (sane)]
...I'll be relying on you tomorrow, Shenhe. Even though I haven't exactly been a big help myself -- I still won't have the patience for anyone who refuses to cooperate.
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I doubt that anybody will. [she tells him, as far as being replaced.
there's a pang, somewhere - that she promised she'd remember buzen. as long as he was remembered, he'd have really existed. she takes a deep breath.]
I will do what is necessary. [she says, with a little nod.] If you need me, I will help.