I know that you’re real, I think [ but he sounds uncertain ] it was more that I erased the universe and ruined everything.
[ he does reach up like he’s going to take the hand though, but then the thought flashes across his mind remember what you did to her and the image of his hand reaching to take someone’s - a woman’s nails painted green, and the skin peeling back like so much paper to reveal nothingness - and he quickly pulls his hand back. ]
I kept choosing wrong. Objectively— Objectively ruined a lot.
[ kind of a small hysterical laugh. eventually though he will reach out and after a long moment, very gently try touching her hand. she probably does not explode into nothingness when he does this. ]
I’m not— I’m not Gnosia. So I didn’t think I could, but, I don’t know - I’m sort of a problem. I don’t think anyone can kill me and you should all probably kill me.
[ he has to take a second to try and remember if he could, but then, shaking his head. ]
Not really.
[ the thoughts in his head are terrible and bad right now mostly, because behind the more clear thoughts there’s the sound of whispering, voices overlapping that sometimes go quiet like they’re listening. but that’s probably okay. Someone has to be the villain. ]
Then that means you are not stuck in another loop, if you can hear them here.
[she says, firmly. as for the rest of it, she kind of - not winces, it's not really wincing, but it's something in her that twists in a sad sort of way at villain. someone has to be. she thinks it shouldn't have to be him, all the time.]
... Were those her hands? [she asks, after a moment, still holding his hand.]
Okay. [ he says the first okay like he doesn’t quite believe it. but after a second, a more confident: ] Okay. Yes. This is ... probably real.
[ but yes. the villain. someone has to be. maybe this whole thing has been about figuring out that being a prince doesn’t work, being a mindless monster doesn’t work, but being a villain seems to work alright - at least for getting things done that need to be done. ]
I— yeah.
[ ... ]
You know, erasing the existence of the world is what the Princesses want. To be free from the story entirely to them means that they have to tear it all down. And I don’t know, I don’t think Elody knows that, not entirely, but I thought it was insane. And now I don’t think it’s so insane anymore.
Sure, if by cleaning it you mean taking it over your head and smashing it to pieces so nothing can be written upon it ever again.
[ he rubs at the bridge of his nose. or. frog snoot i guess. ]
We were stuck in loops. Every time, we’d have to figure out who was Gnosia among us and who was human, to stop the Gnosia from erasing human existence. We went through - I don’t know. Over a hundred of these. We would switch roles. Sometimes they’d be helpful, sometimes, you would be the Gnosia yourself. It was endless.
I was something called The Bug. I'm not-- supposed to exist. A mistake in the universe. And if I was alive at the end of the loop, it destroyed it. I managed to trick them, and then they couldn't kill me.
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[ he does reach up like he’s going to take the hand though, but then the thought flashes across his mind remember what you did to her and the image of his hand reaching to take someone’s - a woman’s nails painted green, and the skin peeling back like so much paper to reveal nothingness - and he quickly pulls his hand back. ]
Best not to. Just in case.
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... You won't do that to me. You can try, but it won't happen. [a pause.] The universe is still here.
[she keeps her hand where it is for now, not seeming to mind if he doesn't grab back.]
You have ruined nothing, Gerard.
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[ kind of a small hysterical laugh. eventually though he will reach out and after a long moment, very gently try touching her hand. she probably does not explode into nothingness when he does this. ]
I’m not— I’m not Gnosia. So I didn’t think I could, but, I don’t know - I’m sort of a problem. I don’t think anyone can kill me and you should all probably kill me.
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she doesn't! she gently touches his hand, and holds it. solid. do for them what they do for you.]
I don't want to kill you anymore. [not now.] You're not Gnosia. I don't even know what that is.
... Let me try something. Will you trust me? Just for a moment.
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A creature intent on destroying humanity. But I wasn’t human, or Gnosia, at the end.
[ he’ll take a second when she offers to try something, but after a second he nods. he trusts her. ]
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Were you able to hear thoughts, while you were on your mission? [she asks out loud, and then: I can hear you.]
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Not really.
[ the thoughts in his head are terrible and bad right now mostly, because behind the more clear thoughts there’s the sound of whispering, voices overlapping that sometimes go quiet like they’re listening. but that’s probably okay. Someone has to be the villain. ]
... I saw her. Elody.
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[she says, firmly. as for the rest of it, she kind of - not winces, it's not really wincing, but it's something in her that twists in a sad sort of way at villain. someone has to be. she thinks it shouldn't have to be him, all the time.]
... Were those her hands? [she asks, after a moment, still holding his hand.]
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[ but yes. the villain. someone has to be. maybe this whole thing has been about figuring out that being a prince doesn’t work, being a mindless monster doesn’t work, but being a villain seems to work alright - at least for getting things done that need to be done. ]
I— yeah.
[ ... ]
You know, erasing the existence of the world is what the Princesses want. To be free from the story entirely to them means that they have to tear it all down. And I don’t know, I don’t think Elody knows that, not entirely, but I thought it was insane. And now I don’t think it’s so insane anymore.
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It's a little like a clean slate, I suppose. [she says, finally, but.] What did you have to do?
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[ he rubs at the bridge of his nose. or. frog snoot i guess. ]
We were stuck in loops. Every time, we’d have to figure out who was Gnosia among us and who was human, to stop the Gnosia from erasing human existence. We went through - I don’t know. Over a hundred of these. We would switch roles. Sometimes they’d be helpful, sometimes, you would be the Gnosia yourself. It was endless.
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[that sounds... awful, it sounds nightmarish. all of the missions do, but.]
... I'm sorry. I can't imagine what that would be like. [she figures he knows what it's like way, way too well, at this point.] But... you ended it.
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I was something called The Bug. I'm not-- supposed to exist. A mistake in the universe. And if I was alive at the end of the loop, it destroyed it. I managed to trick them, and then they couldn't kill me.
[ but buzen had tried. hence the sword. ]