Just pisses me off when people think they can label other people and make them afraid of simple shit like that.
[ It's like how they all label Vash the Humanoid Typhoon, bringer of misfortune and disaster wherever he goes. Sure, it's just in his nature as they say, but every time he watches the idiot put up a fake smile to make himself look as weak as possible, debase himself for the sake of others, it just makes him angry. ]
[she sets the doughnuts aside, looking over the flowers she's still got. she runs her finger over the petals of one.
simple labels like that change people. the humanoid typoon, who tries his best to not look like what his title suggests, and the divine damsel of devastation, who never saw any reason to not be a lovely, merciless statue made of ice.
she rests a hand on her chest.]
Labels are appropriate when you can't seem to prove them wrong.
A monster can be bad, or it can be good. It can be both. It controls the narrative. It isn't up to fate. [...] The choice to spare someone despite knowing you could hurt them is important. You don't think so?
[there's a little bit of irritation again that she's trying to smother.]
They're there because when they're not, I'm more likely to hurt myself and others. [and she wants to trust that she could exist without them, and that it'd be fine, and she'd have control, but.]
I don't want to do that. I promised Nahri and Vash that I would try.
[ The feedback loop of irritation. Wolfwood isn't really trying to repress his, because yes in 'this is how I feel so deal with it' mode rather than repression. ]
Fine. You wanna resign yourself to going back on the mountains when all's done, be my guest. I guess I don't know your life as much as you don't know shit about mine.
[ Wolfwood, always volatile with no physical restraint to hold him, always having to make that balance himself, doesn't really understand. And he figures sometimes it just has to remain like that. ]
[there's something that like - hurts, about that, like. he'll feel it, he'll feel the way she feels just... sad. resigned. this is what she's used to. you are fundamentally different.
she looks down at the flowers in her lap again.]
I don't know anything about yours because you won't tell me. I don't see how that's a failing on my part.
[she picks a petal off one of the flowers and flicks it to the ground.]
There's nothing worth sharing about my life, that's why.
[ There's a faint buzz of tumult, but this one is willfully squashed. It's just what he does, hurt people's feelings. Unfortunately, he's unwilling to bend. ]
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Fine, if you say so.
But you don't bring disaster around just by being around. Just by being you.
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That's nice of you to say.
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[ It's like how they all label Vash the Humanoid Typhoon, bringer of misfortune and disaster wherever he goes. Sure, it's just in his nature as they say, but every time he watches the idiot put up a fake smile to make himself look as weak as possible, debase himself for the sake of others, it just makes him angry. ]
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simple labels like that change people. the humanoid typoon, who tries his best to not look like what his title suggests, and the divine damsel of devastation, who never saw any reason to not be a lovely, merciless statue made of ice.
she rests a hand on her chest.]
Labels are appropriate when you can't seem to prove them wrong.
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Am I a monster to you?
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... You've not given me reason to think so.
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[ Looking back at her. ]
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Is that something people call you? Why?
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No horseshit about fate or inescapable destiny.
[ It's all on purpose. ]
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... Ylfa told me something, a few days ago. She said that in stories, monsters are the ones who decide who gets hurt, and who gets spared.
You have never hurt me.
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What'd you think "mercy" meant? Maybe you're just someone I chose to spare.
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Yes. You chose that. So, monster or no, you're choosing a kindness. [she tucks her hair behind her ear.] It's what I'm trying to do, as well.
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[ The little shreds or emotion do suggest that he doesn't think anywhere remotely that easy, even if he doesn't show it outwardly at all. ]
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a pause]
I'm not moving any posts...
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You can't say a monster chooses who gets hurt and who doesn't, and then saying I'm actually a nice guy for doing exactly that. Is what I mean.
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[poor wolfwood]
A monster can be bad, or it can be good. It can be both. It controls the narrative. It isn't up to fate. [...] The choice to spare someone despite knowing you could hurt them is important. You don't think so?
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[ He can be just as obstinate because they're the same. ]
Look, big girl. There's worse than me out there, I know that for sure. But who's lecturing who, here?
You wanna ban yourself from doughnuts for the rest of your life because some fate you can't even see told you you shouldn't?
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No. [she says, after a moment.] I don't want to. Not anymore.
[but there's a difference between want, and have to.]
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If you're not gonna let yourself, then why even bother with the ropes? They're there for a reason, aren't they.
[ He snorts. ]
Or, I dunno. Learn how to make 'em yourself. Take your own control.
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They're there because when they're not, I'm more likely to hurt myself and others. [and she wants to trust that she could exist without them, and that it'd be fine, and she'd have control, but.]
I don't want to do that. I promised Nahri and Vash that I would try.
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Fine. You wanna resign yourself to going back on the mountains when all's done, be my guest. I guess I don't know your life as much as you don't know shit about mine.
[ Wolfwood, always volatile with no physical restraint to hold him, always having to make that balance himself, doesn't really understand. And he figures sometimes it just has to remain like that. ]
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she looks down at the flowers in her lap again.]
I don't know anything about yours because you won't tell me. I don't see how that's a failing on my part.
[she picks a petal off one of the flowers and flicks it to the ground.]
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[ There's a faint buzz of tumult, but this one is willfully squashed. It's just what he does, hurt people's feelings. Unfortunately, he's unwilling to bend. ]
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Alright. [and another. and another.]
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Quit picking apart your flowers, you worked hard on that.
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