[she hasn't smiled since they got back, but - i don't hate that you're here with me makes her lips twitch, just a little. under the grime and blood and memory of her friends mutilated in the dirt, there's something that's still capable of warmth.]
I don't hate that you're here with me, either.
[she's changed, after what they went through, but at least she isn't alone. she isn't lonely.]
I don't... know what I can provide. But if you need anything from me. [she wants to help. she always does, even if that help is horrible.]
[...This is why he thinks the adventure was the worst for Shenhe -- it was terrible for them all, for sure, and while Rang is always in the habit of prioritizing his own pain above anyone else's.... He can't do that now, not when Shenhe, who'd wanted to save them, had been made into a weapon in the end.
He never thought he could see someone else's pain besides his own. Why did it take an insane cyoa for him to realize this, he's not sure.]
You've given plenty. You always have.
[at least, everything that he deserved, then and now. whether it's a punch to a face or a comeback, and now. just this, vibing.
...]
And I'd rather look at you than the others.
[the little hallucinations always at the corner of his eye. he know shenhe can't be a hallucination.]
[being a weapon suited her surprisingly well. she still doesn't quite know how to take it.]
... I am real. [she says, in agreement. maybe not to the first part, because she's not sure about that, but to the second part. she can be a distraction from the worst of the hallucinations.]
So you can look as long as you want, for now. [she brings a hand up to wipe her horrible bloody face, to get the tears away from her.] I can have a use.
[her heart feels cracked open and torn into. having a purpose, even if it's small, feels better. a sword, an axe, who knows her place.]
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no subject
He really doesn't know what to do when someone tells them that they won't leave. And in this moment, he wouldn't fault Shenhe if she did.]
I don't know what to do either.
[maybe later, they'll keep it in their hearts until they can't suppress it again,]
...But I don't hate that you're here with me.
[even if maybe the person he is deep inside would have preferred shenhe not to have endured it all in the first place,]
no subject
I don't hate that you're here with me, either.
[she's changed, after what they went through, but at least she isn't alone. she isn't lonely.]
I don't... know what I can provide. But if you need anything from me. [she wants to help. she always does, even if that help is horrible.]
no subject
He never thought he could see someone else's pain besides his own. Why did it take an insane cyoa for him to realize this, he's not sure.]
You've given plenty. You always have.
[at least, everything that he deserved, then and now. whether it's a punch to a face or a comeback, and now. just this, vibing.
...]
And I'd rather look at you than the others.
[the little hallucinations always at the corner of his eye. he know shenhe can't be a hallucination.]
no subject
... I am real. [she says, in agreement. maybe not to the first part, because she's not sure about that, but to the second part. she can be a distraction from the worst of the hallucinations.]
So you can look as long as you want, for now. [she brings a hand up to wipe her horrible bloody face, to get the tears away from her.] I can have a use.
[her heart feels cracked open and torn into. having a purpose, even if it's small, feels better. a sword, an axe, who knows her place.]