[shenhe doesn't mind the fidgets, mostly because she is also a little fidgety. she's not perfect at this, either. maybe that'll help.
she'll lead her for a while, but not so long that it's impossible to focus on. even elsa can only let it go for so long before she wants to crawl up a wall.]
[yeah. she breaths long enough that she calms down a little from being on edge, tears rolling down her cheeks silently as she sits still and tries to focus.]
[this is something she's been practicing, too. and while crying makes her uncomfortable - it's only because she knows she isn't competent enough to make it stop.
still. this helped alex. it helped rin, too. so...
she stands up, and moves over to sit close enough to ylfa so that she can wrap her arms around her. it's clumsy. but it's a hug.]
[it's okay. it's clumsy back - a little like holding a wild animal, one that is docile for now but isn't sure it should be allowing this. but as tense as she is, she'll lean against her, still quietly shedding tears.]
...I wanted to protect him. Not punish the person responsible. Protect him.
[she says, quietly. she will stay like this as long as ylfa lets her. it's so strange, sometimes, to see so much of yourself as a child reflected in someone else.]
This place makes that impossible. To put us together and have us fight alone is a cruelty I wasn't expecting.
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[she'll...most a little closer, ears perked up, surprised enough to drop her defensiveness.]
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[and then, after a moment of letting that sit:] My anger has left craters and devastation. I've had to learn how to control it.
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Mine has caused devastation, too. I'd like to learn.
[teach me to conceal not feel, my wonderful role model.]
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Then come here. Meditation is harder than it looks, but you're bright. You'll pick up on techniques quickly enough.
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Sit down. However you'd like, as long as it's comfortable for you. You'll need to be still, and you'll need to be able to breathe.
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...Alright.
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The anger will fade. All you need to do is leave a thread to it, and when you need it, you pull that thread to unravel it. It takes practice.
[going to try to teach this 12 year old how to meditate]
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she'll lead her for a while, but not so long that it's impossible to focus on. even elsa can only let it go for so long before she wants to crawl up a wall.]
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... I'd like to give you a hug if you want one. [she thinks ylfa is calm enough.]
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If you want to, that's okay.
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still. this helped alex. it helped rin, too. so...
she stands up, and moves over to sit close enough to ylfa so that she can wrap her arms around her. it's clumsy. but it's a hug.]
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...I wanted to protect him. Not punish the person responsible. Protect him.
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[she says, quietly. she will stay like this as long as ylfa lets her. it's so strange, sometimes, to see so much of yourself as a child reflected in someone else.]
This place makes that impossible. To put us together and have us fight alone is a cruelty I wasn't expecting.
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If they had just let me stay awake, I could have stopped them. It isn't fair.
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I believe you. [she saw her fighting, the other day.] It may have been you that would be on trial the next day.
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I'm not afraid of that.
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I think I would be a little, if you were.