...When this first happened to me, it felt like I was made strong enough to survive just about anything, but I didn't have anything left to survive for. It seemed really pointless, like I was going on out of habit until I inevitably ran into something stronger than I am.
It's different now, because I know what this is for. I'm like this so I can protect the people who matter to me for a little while.
[it's a little funny how much sense this makes to her, actually, even with how rough around the edges she might be.]
That is a good way to look at it. [she says, thoughtfully.] I'd like to use what I am to protect the people I care about, too. It's taken me longer to figure out than I think it has for you.
If you think about it, in most stories, a monster is the one who decides whether someone gets hurt or gets spared. So if you're the monster, you're also the one who gets to make that decision. At least, that's how I see it.
I don't think physical affliction is the deciding factor. For me, a monster doesn't have to be a negative thing. It's more - when I was growing up, I always hoped I'd become a princess someday. In most stories, girls either get eaten, or, if they're princesses, they're beautiful and worthy of love and so they get rescued. I didn't think there were any other options...
I don't think I'm going to become a princess after all, but I wouldn't mind being more like you.
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More like caregivers. Teachers.
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I don't feel strongly about staying or going.
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But you want to revive yourself, don't you?
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...When this first happened to me, it felt like I was made strong enough to survive just about anything, but I didn't have anything left to survive for. It seemed really pointless, like I was going on out of habit until I inevitably ran into something stronger than I am.
It's different now, because I know what this is for. I'm like this so I can protect the people who matter to me for a little while.
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That is a good way to look at it. [she says, thoughtfully.] I'd like to use what I am to protect the people I care about, too. It's taken me longer to figure out than I think it has for you.
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If you think about it, in most stories, a monster is the one who decides whether someone gets hurt or gets spared. So if you're the monster, you're also the one who gets to make that decision. At least, that's how I see it.
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... You're right. I think that is how I'll see it too. [and then her shoulders ease.] Would you believe me if I said I'm a monster?
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I guess I'd ask what you mean by that, because whether or not I believe you depends on it.
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It isn't a physical affliction, so I wonder if it counts.
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[she smiles a little back at her.]
I don't think physical affliction is the deciding factor. For me, a monster doesn't have to be a negative thing. It's more - when I was growing up, I always hoped I'd become a princess someday. In most stories, girls either get eaten, or, if they're princesses, they're beautiful and worthy of love and so they get rescued. I didn't think there were any other options...
I don't think I'm going to become a princess after all, but I wouldn't mind being more like you.
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What you said about a monster being the one who decides who gets hurt and who gets spared - I think that is what we should work towards.
[a pause.] Perhaps we can practice that together. I think that I could learn a lot from you, Ylfa.
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[she's pleased by this.]
I'd like that a lot.
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Sounds good!