the vibe is just... sad, today, sad and horrifyingly worried. someone's red ropes are maybe not working very well. she will come over to stand or sit by him, though, with a water bottle in hand.]
[Kaveh also has a bottle, but it does not have water in it.
He's glad for her presence, though, even though his emotions barely reflect it. She can come sit by him; he leans against her arm with only a little hesitation, which is either alcohol or character development.]
the water bottle, as it happens, is for him, and she sets it next to his bottle before settling.]
Knowing him I doubt he took it personally. [she says, staring out over the park. she presses her arm to his.] ... But I know that won't stop you from regretting it.
[At least he's not, like, guzzling it down. It's in his hand, but it's still mostly full.
He leans his head back, closing his eyes.]
I told him--I told him that he should have... tried harder. That he should have done a better job of figuring out how to tell me. [It had hurt so much, being drawn to someone who'd seemingly betrayed him. With Rin's death a fresh wound, and Haru's stricken face the salt inside of it. Kaveh has always, always lashed out when hurt, no matter how much he knows he regrets it later.] I was relieved to have space from him, for a little while. So I didn't... I never...
[Never truly let Buzen know when he'd stopped being angry. He'd so foolishly thought he had time.
ALSO I HAD FUCKING WORK AND I DIDN'T PC DANA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA]
she listens, her emotions dim and quiet as usual. there's worry, there, still, but empathy, too. it's interesting, even, to hear this from another point of view. from someone who felt much more strongly about that aspect of it.]
You couldn't have seen this coming. [she says, finally, glancing at him. she hesitates - the only things she can think to say are things she's pretty sure he doesn't need to hear, so there's a decent pause before she speaks again.]
I'm sorry that you had that chance taken from you.
[PUNCHES THE GROUND AND LASHES OUT AT DANA WITH ASWS INSTEAD
But truthfully, her calm--if it can be called that--is... not helpful, because nothing's helpful right now, but comforting. It certainly isn't making anything worse. Her words, too, are the only sort of comfort he can stomach right now, when he feels so undeserving. Of reassurance, of survival, of anything.]
...I think no one did. [Even though that's how this horrible game is designed to work. Even though, in the coldest, most logical way, it almost makes sense. But Kaveh can't reconcile the people he's come to know with the idea of those who would hurt each other. Who would hurt someone like Buzen, who'd been so kind, who'd suffered so much so recently.
(He'd hurt Buzen. He'll carry with that him until he, too, is erased.)]
[shenhe is not good with people. she doesn't know when they right time to say things is and she isn't quite sure what works and what doesn't. but she's learning. carefully, slowly, over the time she's been here, she's found little things that work.
she knows that right now, telling kaveh that she thinks this was planned, that someone knew they could possibly take a whole team out in one go if they got rid of buzen - she knows that isn't what he will want to hear. she knows that it's too cold, and the thing is, she wouldn't know that if the people she's found herself drawn to here hadn't been so sweet to her.
instead of those words, she presses a little closer, and takes a deep breath.]
... What we can do - the only thing we can do - is find out who did it. You can give him a better end if the mystery of it is solved.
[In truth, Kaveh wouldn't have held it against her for pointing out. He's too smart not to realize the potential logic himself, even if it's a choice he would never personally make. But she's right in assuming that it would hurt. And maybe Kaveh takes comfort in pain, sometimes--in knowing that it's what he deserves--but he can't not appreciate the kindness she's showing him, for how little he deserves it.]
...I'll try. [Matsui deserves it, if nothing else. Kaveh's heart aches for him, as a fellow survivor.] It won't bring him back, but--it's all I can do.
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w2, FRIDAY
the vibe is just... sad, today, sad and horrifyingly worried. someone's red ropes are maybe not working very well. she will come over to stand or sit by him, though, with a water bottle in hand.]
no subject
He's glad for her presence, though, even though his emotions barely reflect it. She can come sit by him; he leans against her arm with only a little hesitation, which is either alcohol or character development.]
...I was cruel to him. [Quietly.] Last week.
no subject
the water bottle, as it happens, is for him, and she sets it next to his bottle before settling.]
Knowing him I doubt he took it personally. [she says, staring out over the park. she presses her arm to his.] ... But I know that won't stop you from regretting it.
no subject
He leans his head back, closing his eyes.]
I told him--I told him that he should have... tried harder. That he should have done a better job of figuring out how to tell me. [It had hurt so much, being drawn to someone who'd seemingly betrayed him. With Rin's death a fresh wound, and Haru's stricken face the salt inside of it. Kaveh has always, always lashed out when hurt, no matter how much he knows he regrets it later.] I was relieved to have space from him, for a little while. So I didn't... I never...
[Never truly let Buzen know when he'd stopped being angry. He'd so foolishly thought he had time.
ALSO I HAD FUCKING WORK AND I DIDN'T PC DANA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA]
no subject
she listens, her emotions dim and quiet as usual. there's worry, there, still, but empathy, too. it's interesting, even, to hear this from another point of view. from someone who felt much more strongly about that aspect of it.]
You couldn't have seen this coming. [she says, finally, glancing at him. she hesitates - the only things she can think to say are things she's pretty sure he doesn't need to hear, so there's a decent pause before she speaks again.]
I'm sorry that you had that chance taken from you.
no subject
But truthfully, her calm--if it can be called that--is... not helpful, because nothing's helpful right now, but comforting. It certainly isn't making anything worse. Her words, too, are the only sort of comfort he can stomach right now, when he feels so undeserving. Of reassurance, of survival, of anything.]
...I think no one did. [Even though that's how this horrible game is designed to work. Even though, in the coldest, most logical way, it almost makes sense. But Kaveh can't reconcile the people he's come to know with the idea of those who would hurt each other. Who would hurt someone like Buzen, who'd been so kind, who'd suffered so much so recently.
(He'd hurt Buzen. He'll carry with that him until he, too, is erased.)]
no subject
she knows that right now, telling kaveh that she thinks this was planned, that someone knew they could possibly take a whole team out in one go if they got rid of buzen - she knows that isn't what he will want to hear. she knows that it's too cold, and the thing is, she wouldn't know that if the people she's found herself drawn to here hadn't been so sweet to her.
instead of those words, she presses a little closer, and takes a deep breath.]
... What we can do - the only thing we can do - is find out who did it. You can give him a better end if the mystery of it is solved.
no subject
...I'll try. [Matsui deserves it, if nothing else. Kaveh's heart aches for him, as a fellow survivor.] It won't bring him back, but--it's all I can do.